wat's service all abt?

haha... didn't expect an update so soon rite??? hahahaha.... somehow i feel like i gotta put dis down lest i forget n i bring myself to downfall in future....

well... i guess dis entry applies more to ppl who're serving actively in church or who r involved with church.... so those of u who haf nth to do with church can juz read on if u're juz plain interested if anything else... haha...

well anyway i guess most of us think dat helping out in the various ministries in church is an expression of our faith.... while i dun dispute dat fact... it becomes realli awry when it becomes ur onli expression of faith.... or even worse.. when it becomes our central focus of y we're in church...

anyway even in helping out.... watz our central focus? izzit when we dun help out in church we r seen as less faithful.. or less involved in church.... or less part of the church? or izzit when we do help out we can score points with God n redeem more rewards with our points when The End of Days comes? i tink we've missed the point if ew tink like dat.... remember wat were Jesus' last words to us on earth? "... But you shall receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you; and you shall be witnesses to Me in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth." we were meant to be witnesses to non-believers.... not to be believers labouring towards higher reward points...

so watz all this abt helping out in church? it all converges to one thing... reaching out to others... y r we helping out in church? every single ministry help in outreach in one way or another... directly or indirectly in a supportive role.... take the church concerts for example... the choir's at the forefront directly reaching out to the audience.... but with the support of the AV crew n the ushers this outreach is further enhanced... itz nt dat when we serve in choir we're abt to gain greater favour with God than being in the supportive roles... even the ppl helping out in the kitchen do haf their place in outreach... fellowship lunch as the name implies allows us to make time for us to ineract with other ppl.... exhorting one another as well as reaching out to others....

sometimes being too preoccupied with helping out in church can cloud our true purpose of actually helping out.... so i guess itz gd to realli sit down n tink abt wat we're realli doin when we're serving in these different ministries in church... wat's our focus and/or objective... instead of juz gg thru the motions n misguide our contentment to sidetracked motives....

oh well.. juz tot i'll juz put dis down for myself to refer to in future n remind myself abt wat i'm doing with myself in helping out in church.... lest i fall into the same trap i've been in for a long time.... so til the nxt entry... ciaoz... heh... ^^

slappability...

hey ppl.... been a long time since i updated..... well... not as long as the previous one but still.. hehe.. well anyway i guess dis morning i juz got some inspiration... haha... and itz a nice thought dat i juz wanna blog down...

well anyway itz sadly been several days since i did my last quiet time.... so i figured i shld start on it again todae.... n todae's devotional is truly a refreshing reminder of juz the way God realli is.... well to sum it up... itz abt how God knows us inside out no matter where in the world we are.... and i waz tinking dat God surely knows all my sins and inadequacies... n itz a challenging thought to konws dat He still loves me for who i am.... not bcoz of wat i've done or wat kinda person i am.... i know i'm quite rotten inside when it comes to my mind n faith but God still loves me for who i am.... itz challenging to tink abt it...

"but y make a mountain of a molehill"? well i guess i learnt to appreaciate dis truth more when i work in the service sector.... i get realli realli slappable customers who juz make life realli realli difficult for u and everyone working there.... tell them the charges and they say itz so expensive.... itz not fair to charge them bcoz they're still on warranty when their warranty does not cover the service we offered.... itz not fair to charge them coz they brought down the com a few times to repair n they still get charged for a different problem.... blah blah blah.... itz irksome....

n den i tink of myself and how i regard God... how i juz dun wanna make the afford to wake up earlier to do my quiet time... how i juz skim thru even when i do make an inkling of time to do my quiet time... how i dun live out how i shld live my life as a christian.... basically how i sortof "discount" God of my commitment.... n i find myself rather irksome too.... another "slappable customer" to God..... n when He still loves me like dat.... by remaining faithful when i'm not (e.g. i could haf gotten into some deep shit at work coz of my mistakes but i managed to pass thru)... by simply loving me bcoz of my mere existence n not bcoz of merit or devoutness... i find it unfair..... unfair to God... if anything He shld be the one juz abandoning me n leaving me to my own demise.... but He still loves me.... itz juz mind-boggling...

so wat am i gonna do abt it after all dis rambling? well... i guess itz a reminder for me to start living out a truthful and godly life... i own Him too much n i do not want to take anymore for granted..... well... i guess datz abt wat i wanna say.. hehe.... dun wanna try squeezing water out of a rock.... heh... ok.. so til the nxt entry.... ciaoz.... ^^

baq again.... on the matter of relations....

hey ppl... in a blink of an eye i haven't updated for more than a month alreadi... sorri abt dat.. hehe... had no inspiration.... well... todae i guess i do haf something to write... perhaps it would look a little weird to some who read... heh....

well.. i dun realli talk abt it... but i got a feeling i'll be coming baq to dis situation again in future n i dunno if keeping a log of my thoughts on the matter will help but i'll do it anyway.... the future indeed is extremely unpredictable... stuff u didn't noe would help eventually help u out of a rough spot.... hope i do rmb to come baq to dis when i do come across such a matter again...

hmm... enuff idle bantering i guess... the matter at hand is a matter of relationships.... i guess many of us who aren't attached haf gone thru dis b4... tinking abt whether i shld realli get down to getting a partner for myself.... basically juz raveling n squirming in my loneliness and subtle feelings of nt being appreciated or noticed by others.... itz nt a nice feeling esp when u see others attached or at least getting along well with ppl of opp genders...

so wat's me low-down on dis? well... nth veri ground-breaking tho.... haha... juz a veri simple and humble acceptance of me place in life as well as in society.... i guess i'm nt the veri sociable kinda person... nt in the sense dat i dun like to talk to ppl.... juz dat i guess i dun haf many interesting things to talk abt... so i guess me place in life is juz to play a supporting role in society.... tho it may be hard to swallow coz most ppl including me juz wanna be at the forefront of wateva like in decision making... or maybe in doing something like performing or presenting something of importance.... wateva... i'm juz not "centre of attention" material and i guess i juz gotta accept me piece in life....

perhaps sometimes i tink of the potential of getting into a relationship now... but potential being potential is best left for the future... my role is of a supportive nature now.... juz doing wat i can for whoever asks... perhaps nt even expecting compliment or reward... the time has nt yet come for me to take up a more active role as a partner to someone else..... i dun even noe if i make sense but datz as gd as i can express myself... coz i'm not veri gd with expression thru writing....

some may ask watz the rite time..... well.. frankly i do not know coz i'm nt even there yet.... but all i noe is dat i'll know when i get there and all i hafta do is trust in God's timing for me.... if His plan for me is nt to get into a relationship at all i'm fine with it too.... celibacy's a gift.... queer as it may sound it does make sense.... not many ppl can stay sane in celibacy..... at least i dun tink can if itz for the rest of my life...

relationships r nice things to tink abt but i guess when it realli boils down to actually taking action to get into one itz another matter altogether.... i can onli hope itz sooner than later... but at the rate things r gg i guess sooner will be a longshot.... heh... oh well.... nth to worry abt... juz dat me time's not yet come.... and i juz gotta accept me plight as a bachelor....

well... to summarise... i guess it all comes down to juz waiting for the time to come n in the meantime juz constantly reminding myself of my role as an individual with respect to others in socety....